Alternative storyline of Lucky Shoes

Because so many people said that the story was sick/crazy/insane and asked what I smoke to invoke my imagination, I decided to change the story a little to make it a little more "sane".

It was a fine spring afternoon, the sort that people generally prefer to spend outside, pretending that it's summer and catching colds and hypothermia. Still, it was a fine enough day, and it was all the better to have to spend it indoors, in a room full of people, waiting for the accountant to arrive while watching cartoons from a 102'' plasma TV. And the Lucky Shoes' accountant was growing late. Not even fashionably late by this point, in fact, just dreadfully, horribly, unimaginably late. Nobody minded it, though her company was terribly missed.

The reason for this meeting, apparent "negotiations" were actually a mystery to everyone in the room. All of them were well-prepared for the required "presenting of portfolios" and felt themselves like students that were forced into an exciting and useful course on some type of business management or another. The chairman smiled and waved his hand in the air for attention. "To keep your spirits up, I ordered more pizza and beer. Again!", he announced in a voice filled with joy. "Yay!", the Vice President shouted, fixing his expensive designer jacket, "I hope the accountant makes it here on time to get some, too!"

Just as he uttered these words, the door swung open, and the accountant marched, triumphantly, gently planting her heels onto the eager floor. The gathering looked at her, seemingly baffled - with a good reason, too, as the woman was dressed in a tone some could find unbefitting the occasion. The black business dress was still fine, though, but it was the black veiled hat and the dangerously high stiletto shoes of a matching colour that weren't. A small handbag, and a set of firetruck-red nails completed the picture. The colourful crowd gagged on their cookies, but admitted that the woman's outfit, too, had the right for existance, embracing the diversity.

"I will be brief, ladies and gentlemen, having caused you to wait so long", the accountant declared, "As of today, Lucky Shoes is the owner of the majority of Microsoft's shares, and its brand is currently worth five billion euros. We've been elected as Europe's best shoe-selling company and awarded a Nobel Peace Prize to. That said..."

She made a dramatic pause, looking at the stunned expressions of the members of the board, and, finally, continued, just as the chairman prepared to open his mouth. "You, my dears, will all receive kittens! Fluffy, purry kittens!"

With a short giggle, the accountant produced a kitten from her bag, and did not stop until the room was filled with cute meows of two dozen kittens.